May 26th, 2010
Today I was teaching a corporate comedy improv workshop at a space called Meet at the Apartment, a highly stylized open loft in Soho that is "fully engineered for creative thought to flourish." This trendy venue is equipped with leather couches, interesting art and unique nooks in great quantity. However, it was the ornate wallpaper(stenciled in fluorescent pink) that caught my client's attention. She remarked that within the pink lines were drawings of naked women. I looked at the wall, laughed and made some remark about how risque that was.
The truth is, readers, I couldn't make out the nude images that she was referring to. Admittedly, I have many strengths but being able to decipher images out of any type of jumbled blur is not one of them. When I get pregnant and see the sonogram, I am certain that I will utilize my mediocre acting skills and have some teary over the top reaction as I squeeze my husband's hand in blissful joy and pretend to see a developing mammal in a diagnostic medical image.
Perhaps my brain just stopped trying to find the obvious after Waldo...of "Where's Waldo" fame. And annoyance. I never had any interest in employing my brain to look for someone who was so committed to hiding from me. My instincts tell me that I am not alone in having little to no interest in the challenge of finding a hidden character in a red-and-white striped shirt, bobble hat and fashion backwards glasses.
Waldo, the jig is up. I know where you've been. I hired private animated investigators (in the form of my imaginary handlers in my head) and they revealed to me very telling glossy 8 X 10 black and white pictures that will tarnish your hard to find image.
Let me just say 2 things...Waldo...
- You should be ashamed
- You are a dick
Waldo has been spotted at the following:
- He was found at a Phish concert in Coventry, Vermont....dropping acid with a moose, an antelope and a reindeer.
- To make extra cash, Waldo was discovered on a suburban Pennsylvania street corner. Miming. For blind people.
- He was captured working on his 365 day blog entry challenge, "The Benefits of Littering".
- It turns out that Waldo has become a biker dick and finding great pleasure in running over kittens. (For more info on bike dick-ery...refer to day 285's entry, "Biker Dick. And Proud" - http://jacquelinekabat.blogspot.com/2010/05/day-285-biker-dick-and-proud.html_)
- He been judging wet t-shirt contests in Myrtle Beach.
- He's locked up in a high security prison for stabbing Flat Stanley. With a spork. (Who is Flat Stanley? Refer to Day 102 - http://jacquelinekabat.blogspot.com/2009/11/day-102-flat-stanley.html)
- At this very moment, Waldo is in surgery getting an animated penis enlargement.
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