July 5th, 2010
Yesterday, Independence Day, we celebrated the legal separation of the thirteen colonies from Great Britain in the way that John Hancock intended: Explosives, Hebrew National Hot Dogs and a justifiable excuse to dabble with alcoholism.
It seems as if there is little discussion as to the events that took place on July 5th, 1776. After the partying was over, I imagine that our new nation digested some harsh reality as to what it takes to succeed on their own. Similar to our freshman year in college, the first few weeks as a new country were extremely critical for the nouveau Americans because their actions affected the rest of their lives.
If I had been available on 7-5-76, I would have held a town hall meeting and given the naive colonists concrete tips for guidance and survival tips.
I'd start off by addressing my audience with, "Whatever you do, be sure to be yourself and try to enjoy your new country experience as much as possible. Expect to feel some stress and homesickness, but don't let these issues wear you down."
- Go to the post office and fill out a "change of address" forum.
- Don't feel obligated to be part of a distinct or formal organization right away. You have plenty of time to decide if you want to join fraternities like the Federalists or Anti- federalists. FYI, The Wigs are known for unethical hazing tactics: Tar and feathering.
- Get to know your neighbors and invite them to a mint julep kegger.
- Stay healthy by eating right. Without the Brits around to serve you a balanced meal, you may be tempted to go for those extra onion pies, fried Welsh rabbits and fish muddles.
- Learn to do your own laundry. Separate your petticoats, bodices and pantaloons.
- Although I recommend visiting the Career Services Office, don't feel pressured to make a hasty decision about a career. Being part of an independent nation is the time for you to discover who you are, what you like to do and what you excel at. Take your time. Enjoy exploring your options.
- Learn to cope with homesickness. It's only natural that there will be times when you miss the mother land, even if you were one of those colonists who couldn't wait to get away from them. Find a way to deal with those feelings, such as journaling, Pilates or pigeon shooting.
- Avoid credit card debt.