Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Day 122 - Nice to See You Again, Seinfeld

December 8th, 2009

I saw Jerry Seinfeld this morning in the Saturday Live Studio. I saw him exactly a year ago at Gotham Comedy Club where he showed up to practice a set. He went on stage right after me. Technically, yes, I have opened for Seinfeld. It’s as if we plan to meet this time every year to talk about comedic insight and what it’s like to be a Jew on Christmas. Granted, we’ve never actually spoken but I know people who have talked to him.

I was in the SNL studios with my aunt to watch a pre-production show for a new NBC program called “The Marriage Ref”. Jerry Seinfeld is the creator and executive producer of this show that, according to a press release, “will "feature opinionated celebrities, comedians and sports stars who will candidly comment, judge and offer different strategies for real-life couples in the midst of a classic marital dispute."

Comedian Tom Papa is the impressively capable host and today’s opinionated guests included Greg Giraldo, Jim Breur and some attractive lady from some fashion program that couldn’t match the quick wits of the rest of the panel.

The following were the scenarios where the guests(refs) had to say which domestic partner was right.

Scenario 1
A husband read his wife’s journal that she keeps as a Word Document on their shared computer. The entries evidently had very “juicy” details about her past relationships. He wanted the “journal” out of the house. Yet, he downloaded the document to his PDA. I guess it’s good to have it in a portable device when you’re feeling too good about yourself.

Scenario 2
A wife is annoyed that her husband stands eating at the sink while she and their baby sit at the dinner table. His defense is that its more efficient and clean to be standing. Side note, he was eating a Skippy peanut butter and jelly sandwich. This is also the man who swallows 10 vitamins at once. Ya know, to save time. The wife thinks that will kill him and he says he takes the vitamins to live longer. I wish this couple was in my Speech and Debate class during my sophomore year in high school.

Scenario 3 A husband is disgusted that his wife flosses in bed. I got grossed out just typing that.

Scenario 4 –A wife has had it with her husband for playing Xbox 8 to 12 hours a day. His defense: "My avatar(Zulcan?)fulfills me ways that you cannot.”

So look out for this show when it airs in January. Or don’t. It won’t make you smarter but watching a panel of comedians remark on marriages you don’t want to be in has its perks.

It was nice to see Jerry again and be back in the Saturday Night Live studio. That's right. Been there before. I was an extra on SNL in a MTV spring break parody sketch ten years ago. Did you see me? No. No you did not. My scene was cut. It’s too bad because it involved Horatio Sanz as an obese rapper who had to be rolled out onto the stage. Will Ferrell’s job was to feed him cookie dough. Will Ferrell can do no wrong. "Land of the Lost" didn't really happen. Right?

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