Saturday, January 9, 2010

Day 154 Tune Up of the Soul

January 9th, 2010

Yesterday I tapped into how the ancient Greek philosophers interpreted the “essence” of soul, my hopes that my ethical behavior would give my soul a good report card and then asked you to tell me the color of your soul.

I'm still on a soul kick. My friend told me that people who don't t appreciate the movie “Avatar” and the song "Empire State of Mind" are dead inside. This inspired me to consider other signs that indicate that one possesses a soul of darkness and in desperate need of a tune up:

-You give someone a decaf coffee when they‘ve asked for regular.

-You brag about finding Waldo. We don’t care. He’s a dick.

-You put Disney movies in the vault.

-You watch, work for or have any type of appreciation for Fox News.

-You’re a narc with a cocaine addiction.

-You’re a germaphobe who doesn’t shower enough.

-You’re a Holocaust denier.

-You need to read directions on how to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

-You do the five stages of grief in the opposite order: Acceptance, Depression, Bargaining, Anger and Denial.

-You’re Clippy the cartwheeling Microsoft Word paperclip who possesses an unjustified sense of entitlement.

-You’re the very fertile Elisabeth Hasselbeck who won’t stop breeding.

-You’re a sex therapist. And a virgin

-You groom standard poodles.

-You conceptualized the movie “Angel” that came out in 1984. Tagline: “High School Honor Student by Day. Hollywood Hooker by Night.”

-You’re a thin woman who complains about being fat.

-You’re a Benihana chef who doesn’t know how to make tin foil swans for leftovers.

-You think your falsetto can be compared to Barry Gibb and Daryl Hall.

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