Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Day 10 Oh, This Party is For You. Festive Sausage Ball?

August 18th, 2009


In Seinfeld ‘s third season, we learned that an encounter with a pez dispenser could be overwhelmingly traumatic. AND when there is emotional or psychological injury in TV land.. there are interventions.

These orchestrated attempts by friends and family to get someone to seek professional help because of a crisis seem to be played out in sitcoms , dramas and from what I understand, a reality show called “Intervention.” I can’t even go there now. Pause. OK. I can certainly see the wisdom in this type of group confrontation on television. We choose this form of escapism because we are guaranteed 2 things: Conflict AND Resolution. An example of when television didn’t quench our need for a quick fix : Slow speed OJ chase. Borrrrriiiinnnggg.

The strange thing is that I’ve never been to an intervention or known anyone who has partaken in the “let me help you recover soiree.” Although there are times that I have been tempted to throw one for myself because I’m a big fan of cru de te, boxes of wine and denial.

I just have a hard time seeing this equation: Unsuspecting addict + swarms of “well intended loved ones” = EFFECTIVE & AWESOME. First, just the logistics of gathering everyone together seems like a lot of work. Unless maybe we combine events. “It’s grandma’s 90th birthday and the perfect time to confront Uncle Jimmie about his porn addiction.”

It seems improbable that we’ll hear the person who has reached the depths of despair claim that an intervention was his or her first step to recovery. “I saw my 4th grade Hebrew teacher in my living room and I knew my freebasing days were over. Thanks Rabbi Shlomi.”

I fear that these gatherings(surprise parties) would ultimately escalate the problem at hand. If I were the unsuspecting guest, I am certain that I would feel painfully vulnerable, powerless and exposed.

And that’s why I drink to begin with.

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