Friday, November 5, 2010

Day 374 - Ask Jax - Part 29

November 5th, 2010

This is the 29th installment of my "Ask Jax" series. I'm open to answering ANY of your pressing inquiries with little to no thought, accuracy and sensitivity.

Is it wrong that I get annoyed when people say, “Let us not forget 9-11?” – Anonymous, New York, New York

Jax’s Answer: Not as wrong as my friend who says, “Let us not forget 11-9.” He found out 2 months late.

Is seeing someone who lives in NJ geographic relationship suicide? - Heather Antonelli, Brooklyn, New York

Jax’s Answer: If your geographical preferences lean toward an over-paved gloomy wasteland that’s spiritually dead, then I think your relationship has the capacity to develop into something that could benefit your mind, body and spirit. Or at least just your body. I say proudly saunter across the Hudson and nuzzle comfortably in the bosom of your new man. Just watch out for the gold chain. Also, please remove your bumper sticker that says: Jersey, A Good Place to Pass Through. At Night. While you’re there, I recommend also disposing of the bumper sticker that reads: DUKAKIS '88.

Can people change - Page Newsom Pelphrey, Guilford Connecticut

According to a Brady Brunch song that aired January 14th, 1972, the world learned that people can indeed change. Let’s review the lyrics to “Time To Change” which allowed Peter to embrace his awkward journey through puberty.

“When it's time to change, then it’s time to change

Don't fight the tide, come along for the ride, don't you see

When it's time to change, you've got to rearrange

who you are into what you're gonna be.

Sha na na na, na na na na na, sha na na na na

Sha na na na, na na na na na, sha na na na na"

Powerful stuff. We too should take Peter’s lead and know that we can overcome the fear of change… of course, only through Brady song.

Have you ever had sex while coming off sodium pentothal and hopped up on Jack Daniels and Percocet?Scott Stern, Los Angeles, California

Jax’s Answer: According to my rash, yes…yes I have.

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